The Christmas Children by Irene Brand

Author:Irene Brand
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub
Publisher: Steeple Hill
Published: 2003-10-12T21:00:00+00:00

Chapter Ten

After Paul left to take the children to school, Carissa cleared the kitchen table and started making sketches for the costumes needed for the nativity scenes. She had an afternoon appointment at the church with the other two women who were helping with the costumes. Belva had said there was a fabric shop in town where they could buy the necessary materials at a discount. They would need twenty-five garments, and it would involve a lot of sewing. Luckily, she had brought her favorite portable machine with her.

She hadn’t gotten far with her designing when Paul returned. She heard his truck in the driveway, and she wondered if he would go to the apartment. If he didn’t, the long-overdue talk must take place.

“Am I interrupting?” Paul said as he entered the kitchen, bringing the outdoor fragrance of wintertime with him.

Carissa’s hands wrapped tightly around her pencil. “I’m making sketches of the costumes we need for the pageant.”

“I thought we could talk now, but if you’re too busy…” His voice trailed off.

“Let me finish the lines of this shepherd’s robe so I won’t forget what’s in my mind. I’ll join you in the great room in a few minutes.”

Even as she finished the sketch, Carissa’s heartbeat accelerated and she had trouble focusing on what she was doing. The hour of reckoning had come—the time when she knew that, for her continued happiness, she must talk about things that would be difficult to reveal.

She poured two glasses of apple juice, and handed one to Paul as she entered the great room. He sat on the couch, and she chose a chair directly opposite him. She needed to look him in the eye while they talked.

“I want to apologize for what happened,” Paul said. “I can’t say I’m sorry I kissed you, because I enjoyed it, but I am sorry I did it when you didn’t want me to.”

Carissa waved aside his apologies. “I’m not mad at you—I’m mad at myself. I accept the blame. There’s no excuse for my behavior. It was only a brotherly kiss at first, but my reaction invited more.”

Paul wondered at the look of humiliation in Carissa’s eyes.

“Why does my touch disturb you?”

She shook her head. “This isn’t easy for me to say. You accused me of acting like a girl who’d never been kissed. And that’s true. I hadn’t been kissed before.”

Paul stared at her in disbelief. “What’s the matter with the men you’ve met through the years?” he asked, a tinge of wonder in his voice. “You’re a vivacious, charming woman.”

Her heart hammered foolishly at his words, but she made an effort to speak calmly. “I made up my mind a long time ago that I wanted to avoid a close relationship with any man.”

She swallowed hard, gripped the sides of the chair and closed her eyes for a moment.

Paul was aware that this revelation was hard for Carissa, and he wondered if he should tell her that she didn’t have to explain. He didn’t

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